hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
