Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
