i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
