ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
