Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
he thought i was a dude.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Randomize
