Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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