so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
