fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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