i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
