just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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