Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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