yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I think your dad took our porno
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
