She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
