Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
