We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
