sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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