so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
