i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i think im in europe. pls send help
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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