I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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