so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
