So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
