then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
