Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Randomize
