we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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