no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
