scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
