im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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