I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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