I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
