White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
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