He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He shit in the fireplace
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
