he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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