why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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