Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
