we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
A+ Viking dick
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