You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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