after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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