NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
