Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
