but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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