That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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