i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
