I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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