Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
