Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Randomize
