addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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