Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
