I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
