You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
