When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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